Things I Love Thursday

This craigslist ad for a 1995 Pontiac GT is amazing/hilarious/awesome.  Thanks Meg!

These racist, homophobic responses to a black hockey player's goal made me a very sad panda.

A complete guide to "Hipster Racism." A very important read.

40 Secret iPhone Features and Shortcuts.  Thanks Maryam!

Annoyingly Cute Dog is Nervous Passenger.  This is so adorable.  Thanks to my friend Jessica for this!

Estimating the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow. Got this from my father-in-law!

Internet Stock Images from the 1990s.  These are hilarious.

Awesome Tumblr: Potter Facts.

You're Bored? That's so AWESOME.

These cute lunches are amazing. I wish someone would make them for me.

Nobody Tells This to Beginners.

9 Unintentional Threatening Notes and Drawings by Children. Thanks to No Model Lady for this!

Call me a hipster but I love these t-shirts.

Children imitating famous movie characters.

My blog buddy April is back to blogging after a 6-month hiatus...and she's pregnant! Check out her blog by clicking here.

We've been watching the entire original Star Wars trilogy, so I was particularly happy to find these awesome drawings of Ladies Troopers...basically sexy illustrated ladies as Storm Troopers.  Not totally SFW.

How about an instant dance party?

This tweet about Nickelback made me laugh and also made me want to cry so very hard.

36 Essays on Writing by Chuck Palahniuk.

MD is My New Favorite Acronym

I found out the other day that because Rob has been working straight for the last two weeks he was entitled to a "Mandatory Day Off"(MD on the crew manifest thingy I've been monitoring) today, meaning he cannot be called out on a fire until tomorrow.  Granted, they did this because had they gotten called out before having a day off he only would've been able to go for 7 days instead of 14 because they haven't had a day off in two weeks,  and now that they've had a day off they can and most likely will go out for 14 since they're first on the list, but hey, I'll take what I can get for now.

When your husband does scary things like mine you try to appreciate all the time together you can find.

I woke up on Tuesday fucking pissy as hell.  Our hot water heater was broken, and since it was the day before Rob's MD (note: they don't actually call it that, I just am for simplicity's sake and I'm lazy) I figured he'd probably end up getting called out just because the Forest Service wants to spite me.  I'm trying out new ways to deal with shit and my latest is negativity and martyrdom, what do you think?

Luckily I got to meet up with a few fire-wives for a doggy playdate, got a lot of work done, had the hot water heater fixed (thanks plumber who has an impressive row of gold teeth!), and best of all Robbie came home fire-free, so my spirits were lifted immensely.

We had a yummy dinner of chicken cacciatore together and decided to watch the beginning of the original Star Wars trilogy, which I awesomely and rightfully bought a few weeks ago.

So all in all, despite my Negative Nancitude, I'd say Robbie's awesome day off is off to a great start. Today I have to work, but we're going to find time to take Cypress back to the dog park, snuggle a lot, and watch more Star Wars together.

Bits and Pieces on a Sunday

1. This weekend has been lovely so far. On Saturday morning I went on a hike with Rob's crew mate's girlfriend and her husky beastie.  Cypress loves huskies, especially male ones, so they got along really well.  Unfortunately Cypress took the "newness" of a new friend and beastie as an excuse to act like a shithead, and she appropriately proceeded to eat a bunch of shit she found.  I was pretty furious. Luckily I had some extra antibiotics from her last shit-experience and she seems to be fine.

2. I'm sorry, truly sorry for writing so much about my dog's shit on here.  Rob told me the other day that I probably sound like a STFU Parents submission, just with my dog instead of a kid.  Ashamed face.

3.  I really enjoyed spending time with Rob's crew mate's girlfriend and we're already making plans to hang out again soon.  I think having someone nearby to hang out with and who understands all this nonsense will be super helpful.

4. My therapist and I were talking about staying busy this summer--in hopes of not going totally apeshit again when Rob inevitably leaves--and she had the idea of taking a class at the local community college.  I looked around and I can take some online graphic design/Photoshop classes, plus maybe a language class or two, or only $99 a piece. Not too shabs, right? I doubt I'll learn anything completely revolutionary but the structure will help keep me busy and (hopefully) not too terrified of Rob getting hurt or leaving me for good.

5.  Friday night was pretty rough even with Rob back.  He fell the fuck asleep within seconds of going to bed so I got up and did some of my therapy worksheets which helped a ton.  I already feel like I'm in a much better place and hopefully Rob's next fire trip--which could last as long as 14 days--won't be as difficult as this last one. Yesterday I likened the whole thing to my fitness journey, and bear with me as I explain this metaphor. The first day I broke down my muscles (my emotional strength), dealt with the pain of the fallout, and as I get more experience my body (mind) rebuilds itself and is made even stronger for when things get more difficult.  Cheesy, and probably a little tortured, but it's working for me so I'll go with it.

6. All of these points are about Rob and fires and things, and I feel like I've been far too whiny about it lately so let me deviate a bit.  Does anyone have any advice for baking with a gas oven? I've tried several iterations of our favorite Nutella lava cookies in various temperatures and they still end up with charred bottoms. Did anyone else giggle at "charred bottoms?" Because I totally did.

7. I'm not going to apologize for it, since I'm sure your sun does not rise and set on what I write here and won't pretend as such, but my blog has really been kind of "meh" lately.  I had a burst of inspiration but sadly the funk I found myself in last week sapped me of all my energy to write, hence this really lazy post. Anyone have any blogspiration tips that don't include DIY projects? Because I fucking suck at those.

8. Someone posted this on Facebook and it made me laugh for a really long time, so I'm sharing it with you.

9. Okay my friends, tell me something happy about your weekend! Do it! Now!

After Nine to Five Giveaway Winner

The winner of the After Nine to Five giveaway is Mary Gilliam of Mommaruthsays!  

Congrats, Mary! I sent you (and Ashley) an email earlier today so you should be all set!

Thanks everyone for entering!

Also, so this post isn't all about giveaways, here's my dog being cute:

Happy Day

First of all, I want to thank you all for the amazingly sweet, awesome comments, Tweets, and emails you sent me about my post yesterday.  I don't have a lot of friends nearby but it's nice to know I have such great ones living inside my computer.  I love you all.

Today was a much better day than the last few.  Yesterday I talked through the whole missing-Rob-thinking-he's-in-Iraq thing with my therapist and was in a much better place with the whole thing.  I woke up dreading doing my Jillian Michaels Ripped in 30 exercise, not so much because it's tiring but because I'm tired of watching the exact same sequence that I have for the last 5 days.  Instead I went for a run with Cypress and it totally kicked my ass, so, win.

Just before my run Rob sent me a text saying he was on his way home and would be off by 6pm! I just about totally danced for joy. I couldn't stop smiling.

After getting a ton of work done I took Cypress for a walk and Robbie called me for the first time since Tuesday.  I was so, so fucking excited to hear his voice.  It's 5pm now so he should be home in an hour and a half, assuming no fires have popped up here in Santa Fe.

I stopped by the mailbox and found that my giveaway prize from Zelde's blog had arrived all the way from the UK! I won a hard boiled egg shaper thingy that's adorable and she also sent me some of her favorite Swiss milk chocolate!

As a side note, the ingredients on this chocolate are listed in two languages (German and French), neither of which I speak.  Could anyone tell me for sure if this chocolate has flour or barley malt or other gluten-y things in it? I want to chow down.

The final amazing 1/2 part of my day was that Cypress was finally able to go to the bathroom with no difficulty/diarrhea, etc.  I know, this is so gross, and I promise I won't show you a picture of it or anything...I've just been so anxious about her for the last week and it was such a relief to know she's okay.

The only semi-bummer of the day was that it turns out Rob wasn't gone long enough to warrant giving him another weekend (since his "weekend" was Wednesday and Thursday and he was on the fire for both of those days), so he'll be back to work on the normal schedule tomorrow.  I'm just crossing my fingers they don't get called out between now and Tuesday so we can at least have somewhat of a weekend together.

But tomorrow I've made plans with Rob's crew mate's girlfriend to get our beasties together for a hike! So it's not all bad.

I hope you all had a great week, and once again, thanks for your continued support!

Self-Indulgent Whining

I am about to engage in some hardcore whining. If you're one of those people who blogs or tweets about how negative and complain-y the blog world gets, you might want to skip past this one.

Rob's been gone since Tuesday and I have been totally blindsided by how much if affected me.  As I told you guys in my TILT post, I got the text that he was leaving and just totally dissolved into tears.  I knew it was coming but I don't think that I adequately prepared myself for how I'd react when it finally did happen, despite having around 4 months to do so.

I'll be honest, this feels like Iraq all over again.  I know deep down he's so much safer doing this for several reasons (the main one being that fire doesn't usually try to kill you, and as we all know the fire insurgents haven't used IEDs for years) but for some reason my mind and my whole body go back to that year where I didn't know if the next phone call from his parents would be to tell me that he was gone.  My phone comes with me everywhere, including to the bathroom, on walks with Cypress, or when I move from one room to another (in our two-room casita).  My mind is flooded with images of him being hurt and me not being there, or of coming home from a walk with Cypress to see men in fire-suits at my door (I don't know how the whole notification thing happens with the Forest Service if you can't tell).  In between the spurts of crying I feel like a total zombie.

A pretty cactus flower picture to break up the text and remind you that I'M IN THE DESERT. P.S. doesn't this flower look kind of fake?

I imagine if you're a military spouse and you're reading this it probably comes across as pretty annoying; truthfully I was and still am annoyed when people compare relatively normal work trips to deployments. I just honestly don't know how else to deal with this shit.  The only time I had to worry about my husband being killed (other than now) was when he was in Iraq and that's my only point of reference.

I feel really angry, angry at Rob for always wanting to do dangerous jobs without thinking about how hard it can be at home and angry at myself for being angry about it and turning it into something that's about me.  I'm worried, worried that he isn't calling because something went wrong or that he just doesn't want to talk to me (I know, I know).  I'm scared of finding myself alone, or that Rob will be horribly burned or otherwise injured.

This is the first of many fire trips and I know eventually I'll get numb, just like I did during the deployment.  In between my bitchin' pity parties I'm also trying to "check the facts," as my therapist says, and remember that though this job is more dangerous than my job he's still as safe as he could possibly be.

 Sometimes the PTSD just rears its ugly head and  makes it absolutely impossible for me to put shit in the correct context--which is where you and my blog come in, so thank you.

Thanks for "listening," guys, you're all awesome.

Things I Love Thursday

This week's TILT probably isn't that great. I haven't been feeling me the last few days, I hope you'll forgive me.

The Photoshop Troll - I had a hearty laugh at many of these.  Thanks Nova!

Check out these wicked cool double exposures.

This awesome website Drinkify - enter the music you are listening to and it suggests a drink recipe to accompany that music.

Really cool examples of forced perspective photography.

This awesome moment between a wild bobcat and a housecat (thanks to my lovely friend Jessica for this).

I've had a pretty shitty week and this video always makes me smile.

Why the Student Loan Forgiveness Act of 2012 is the worst idea ever.

Young People in the Recession: The War Against Youth.

This guy took video of his daughter every week from birth to 12 years old.  The time lapse video he created from those shorter videos is pretty neat.

Neat things to do with upcycled shutters.  My brain aches from the hipster aura that is oozing from this page, but whatevs, they're pretty.

Nerdy Day Trips. We're planning a trip to England/Ireland/Scotland and I think this could be pretty helpful!

The Evolution of Corporate Logos.

This site has lots of cool things, like Disney Star Wars, Famous Hairstyles, and freaking awesome Backyard Offices.

Your Scene Sucks.

The history of the bikini.

If you can't tell when I get even a little sad I transition to "super melancholy" pretty quickly, especially when it comes to Rob. I'm almost ashamed to tell you guys how stressed and bummed I've been the last few days when I know firsthand that it could be so much worse. I hope you'll still love me.  Anyway usually when this feeling sort of descends on me I listen to sad (and still awesome) music, like this song and this song.